For The Moon and Beyond

During my husband's deployment it felt like everything was falling apart. Oddly enough, it felt as if things were falling in place too. As I prayed and asked God to guide me during the time my husband was gone, a simple phrase came into my mind.  "I will walk with you", I heard. I wrote it down on a piece of paper and taped it to my mirror so I could see it every day. "I will walk with you" has become a phrase that is close to my heart and I think of it often. When I get anxious, worried, and start isolating myself.  When my husband left on deployment, I was in the middle of nursing school and raising two little kids and found out we were expecting a third before he left. About a month after he left I got into a car accident while pregnant, but thankfully baby and I were okay. We were living with family at the time, but unexpectedly everyone moved out of state. I had my baby mid deployment and 2 days after birth he was admitted to the NICU for a rare heart condi...

It's a little odd to think of my husband being gone for a year, especially now that we just found out we'll be having our third baby. It's a mix of emotions, and even though I didn't realize it at first, it seems like (at least on my part), I'm in a grieving process. We didn't think he'd been getting deployed- it seemed everyone had already had their things figured out. About 2 weeks after we'd found out I was pregnant, we were pulled aside on our way out of the Marine Corps Ball and told there was a chance my husband would be getting deployed. Two weeks after that, we got word that he'd be going to the Middle East for a year. Since finding out I've been rushing to figure things out as well as trying to cope with whatever emotions have come my way. I can't say I'm sad, but I've had moments of sadness, as well as anger and everything else that comes unexpectedly like excitement and fear. Of course I don't want my husband to be ...

Recently I've been on "waiting mode", and I hate it. It requires ALL of my patience, makes me stress and most of all, it forces me to look at the things I've been dealing with from every perspective- good and bad. I'm the kind of person who will make lists when I have an important decision to make. I'll make a list of the pros and cons, pray about whatever my decision is and go with it. But recently, a lot of the decisions in my life have NOT been up to me. We recently got word from the Marine Corps that there may be a deployment happening- one in which my husband could possibly get deployed. It's been forever since we found out about it (at least it feels like it!), and now we're reaching the end of September with no final answer. If this deployment does happen, he'll leave in December, and all I want to do is prepare for it- but is he even going?! We have no idea, nobody knows the definite answer, so I've been forced to be patient- which is...

Recently I had a tonsillectomy,  and I must say it has been anything but easy. And even with all the expected and unexpected trials, I have once again been humbled by the love my Father in Heaven has for me and my family. From the moment I decided to get my tonsils taken out, it just seemed like everything fell right into place. The date for the surgery was on a Friday my husband and in-laws wouldn't be working, my dad and step mom came back from vacation that weekend and took the kids while my hubby worked, my mom and stepdad came by with flan, which I'd been craving, a neighbor babysat so I could rest...honestly, the blessings have been endless. I've been in awful pain, which has been difficult not only on me, but my husband as well. He's had to balance taking care of the kids, the house, his new job, all while still making sure all my meds have been taken on time, giving me priesthood blessings, etc. He's been a great nurse and friend, I couldn't ask for mo...

Momo (as we call our baby Danny) turned 1 last December, and it seems like his first year flew by. I've wanted to write his birth story from the moment he was born, but it seemed like every moment was so rushed with a toddler and a baby that I'd get distracted. Add a puppy to mix and things almost got out of hand!lol **TO SKIP STRAIGHT INTO LABOR SCROLL DOWN** I feel like Momo's birth story is SO different than Luna's, and to me it feels like it started a long time before he was born. To me it actually started right after I had Luna. Since I had a C-section with Luna I felt so determined to NOT have another C-section that I kept being led to different people and sources that could help me prepare for another baby. One of these people was a friend of mine named Kira who is a birth specialist, and we became very close during this whole process. For me, having a C-section was traumatizing. Not that I had a horrible experience or was mistreated (like in some cases...

I've been thinking about this post for a long time (like many others I still intend to write ) but this week someone opened my eyes to understand this clearly. There are SO many branches to this topic, but the pain I'd like to talk about is not physical pain, but spiritual pain. Now think with me for a minute and answer the following questions. If you say (or think) "yes" to any of them, keep those answers in mind. -Have you ever felt hurt, sad, angry, or any negative feeling because of something someone did (or didn't) do? - Have you ever felt anguish, sorrow, or any other negative feeling because of something YOU did (or didn't) do? -Have you ever felt helpless, hopeless, or any other negative feeling because of a certain situation you couldn't control or your current circumstances? The reason I chose these questions is because these are things I HAVE felt, and for the most part, I'd say it's safe to say MOST people have felt this at one poi...

Lately it seems like a flow of different topics have been coming into my mind, and I figured I'd write about them. Not all in this post, but I had to start somewhere because they're out of my comfort zone, and I don't want to ignore the need to write. Due to what I'll call a "spiritual awakening" a few years ago, I decided to REALLY study the scriptures and other Gospel related materials throughout the last few years. When I say "study" I mean truly study by reading, genuinely asking the my Father in Heaven questions, constantly praying and exercising faith that I'd receive my answers. I can't say I've received ALL my answers, but I've received many more than if it hadn't put any effort into it. There's a saying in Brazil that I heard all the time growing up that says something along the lines of "if you look for it you'll find it", and as I've applied this to the Gospel of Jesus Christ,  I've found man...

Hopefully I'm not embarrassing my husband too much by sharing this story, but it's his birthday! So why not? haha I had to highlight one of the reasons I love him and why others admire him. A few years ago before my brother Amon passed away Daniel and I went to visit him and my mom. My mom needed help with something that required her and I to go out for 45min or so, and Daniel ended up babysitting Amon. Now, for those who don't know, my brother had special needs and had the mentality of an 8 month old baby. He required 24/7 care (although he could walk), so leaving him with anyone besides our immediate family was very rare. Even though it wasn't an easy task, my sweet new fiance (at the time) took it on and my mom and I left. When we arrived he was giving my brother a shower because he'd had a dirty diaper. I remember feeling so many things (especially humbled) in that moment but I kept myself together and asked him: Me: "How come you gave him a shower ba...

About a year ago I made my own cough syrup for the first time. It was somewhat by accident, but it's probably the best accidental thing I've ever done. I had a ton of ginger my mom gave me, and it would go bad if I didn't use it soon! So I used that ginger, added some other ingredients and created my accidental cough syrup that has worked every time we have a cough. I don't like taking medicine, so this cough syrup turned out to be perfect for me because I made it with all natural ingredients and I MADE IT! Which I felt extremely proud of! Since this has worked so well for my family I figured I should share it in case it can also help someone out there! I also have a "cure all tea" I make every once in a while...but that's a recipe for another day. Without further ado, the recipe: Homemade Cough Syrup Ingredients: 2 cups Water chopped fresh ginger (about a handful, but you can use more or less)  10 oz Honey 2 tbs Turmeric (powder) Dire...

Luna is almost two, and although it seems "too late" to be writing her birth story, I figured it couldn't hurt. Hopefully she'll appreciate it when she's older and I'll be able to reflect on that experience before our new baby is born! Luna was due November 21st, 2014. The first time I started having contractions of any kind was on November 8th, while I was out with my husband at the Marine Corps Ball. It was funny because he was hoping she'd be born on Nov. 10th (on the Marine Corps birthday), but Luna had different plans. After that first day of contractions, they didn't come back until Thursday the 13th at around 10am. They started coming every 15-20min, nothing painful, just felt like very light cramps. It wasn't until Friday night around 8 when we were supposed to go rock climbing that my husband and I decided maybe we shouldn't.. That night I ate a big dinner (becuase I was told once I got to the hospital I wouldn't be able to...

What I'm writing today is not for everyone, but it is for those who are willing to listen (or read) and who want to better themselves. For a long time I've been meaning to write this but I've been putting it off. Mainly I've been putting off writing this because of laziness (cause sitting in front of my computer is not my favorite thing) and also because of fear of being ridiculed (which always happens when talking about this subject).  About a year ago (in June of 2015) I had an experience that completely changed the way I thought God worked. I won't go into too much detail, but I had an experience and received very specific instructions from Heavenly Father as to what I needed to do for my family to be prepared for things that are going to happen. I think (generally speaking) that anyone who has ever read the Bible and the Book of Mormon know what these events are, but I don't know how many people are actually paying attention to what they are (I definitely...

I'm human, just like every person on this planet, therefore I make mistakes. I'm right some of the time, but I'm still learning just like everyone else. But, there are some things I thought I knew that I'm finding out I'm very wrong about how I thought it all worked, but I'm happy to be finding out the right way. School is always a challenge in one way or another, no matter who are, but if you're like me you'll probably be stressing out over a million things, cry, have meltdowns over exams, and just want to quit. I'm sure that scenario sounds very familiar to a lot of people, I'm not alone. Although school can be hard, I can honestly say I love it. I love going to school and learning new things. I just love learning, period. This semester was different though, even though I just had a math class and zumba, it was very different. I guess it was the way I approached it, but the things I learned were not only about math and zumba, but I learned ...

In March of 2013 Daniel left for bootcamp 2 days after proposing. After he left I made it a goal to write him every single day I wasn't with him, especially because I was afraid of losing my mind. We'd spent nearly every single day together since we started dating on June 8th, 2012 and being alone without him at that time was probably one of the hardest things I'd ever done. Although I survived, it wasn't easy and there were some things I did to keep my sanity. 1- I wrote him EVERY SINGLE DAY. I wrote him a total of 88 letters. When I say letters I also mean paragraphs, as there were some nights I was way too tired to write more than that. I had a notebook I took everywhere with me, and I'd write as if I was talking to him every single night. For me that was therapeutic most of all because I was so used to talking to him every single night, whether it was in person or on the phone. Another thought that always helped was that every letter I wrote meant I was one d...

*NOTE*   As I am an extremely cheesy person and this is from my point of view, it is an extremely cheesy story. Read at your own risk. Haha WHEN IT HAPPENED! Friday, March 15, 2013 HOW WE GOT ENGAGED! Since the first day I met Daniel on a high school  field trip , he always planned on joining the military, and in February of 2013 he finally swore in! At first I was nervous about him going to  b ootcamp  on March 18th, 2013, but I knew this was a big step in our lives, and the sooner he left the sooner he'd be back. Since the beginning of our relationship, we always talked about marriage and what the purpose of it was, so we knew we would get married someday. To us marriage has always been a sacred topic, especially because God has always played a big part in our lives.  During the week of March 15th, Daniel started acting a little funky. He got constant calls from my mom, kept texting secretly' had to run errands without me, and my dad kept calli...

For a long time I've thought about writing a blog. For many different reasons, but the main one being I wanted to leave some sort of record for my kids. Although I keep a diary and I've kept other records, I feel as if this one may not only benefit my kids but others who may be struggling and are interested in what I have to say. My intentions for this blog is to use it to express my opinions about life, my beliefs, relationships, answer questions and share a variety of different interests that I have. I hope to share a little about my life in hopes that it may help someone out there in this big world (especially my kids). Some people may like and agree with what I have to say, but I certainly don't expect anyone to. It's a sad, mistaken and confused world we live in, and anyone has the freedom to believe in what they want.  I am big believer in "you find what you're looking for" so I strive to find the good in the world (although at times it seems...