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Deployment, Pregnancy, and Hope

It's a little odd to think of my husband being gone for a year, especially now that we just found out we'll be having our third baby. It's a mix of emotions, and even though I didn't realize it at first, it seems like (at least on my part), I'm in a grieving process.

We didn't think he'd been getting deployed- it seemed everyone had already had their things figured out. About 2 weeks after we'd found out I was pregnant, we were pulled aside on our way out of the Marine Corps Ball and told there was a chance my husband would be getting deployed. Two weeks after that, we got word that he'd be going to the Middle East for a year.

Since finding out I've been rushing to figure things out as well as trying to cope with whatever emotions have come my way. I can't say I'm sad, but I've had moments of sadness, as well as anger and everything else that comes unexpectedly like excitement and fear. Of course I don't want my husband to be gone, I don't want to be without him while going to school, working, taking care of our babies and pregnant to top it all off, but I'm also not just going to sit here and act like I'm in a terrible situation.

When it comes to anyone's situation while their husband is deployed, I know that I have absolutely nothing to complain about. When it comes to moments of weakness- which I know I'll have- I might cry and complain to myself because I miss HIM, but I know that I'll be in good hands while he's gone. I have my in-laws who have gone through the same situations, who have dealt with multiple deployments, fears and tears, and they're more than willing to help me, support me and even cry with me along the way.

I have my entire husbands family and my family- parents, step-parents, brothers, grandmothers, aunts, uncles, cousins, second-cousins, great-aunts and uncles- I mean seriously, the list is absolutely endless. We have all these loving family members who have expressed their love for us and willingness to help with anything. I honestly don't know what I'd do if had married into another family. His whole family has been there for us in the past when we've needed them, so I know I can trust them and count on them.

We also have amazing friends who have helped us with our kids, or bringing meals to us in the past, friends that are family. Friends who have shown us that we can count on them and who are ready to help us with anything we may need. We have an amazing church family as well that have expressed their love for us and have continued to help in any way we've needed. We've been helped many times by those in our ward, and we know that they're also waiting to serve us with open arms any time we need.

Between so many people I know that I won't be alone or go without anything at any point during during my husbands deployment. The hardest part about dealing with knowing that he'll be gone is that I cry a LOT. I cry because I'm humbled to receive so much love from those around me. I'm humbled to know that even if my husband isn't here my kids and I will always be taken care of.


It's odd in happy way to know everything will be okay. Of course there's a part of me that knows I could throw myself a pity party, feel sorry for myself, etc. But I know better than that. I know that none of that will help me, worrying and being scared won't do me any good, and it sure as heck won't solve any of my problems. I could sit here and cry and be sad the entire year he's gone and it still won't make the year go by any faster.

Either way, I got stuff to do. For the next year I'll be busy anyway. I have endless amounts of homework to do, lots of trips to the dinosaur museum and reading with my kids planned, I know people in our family will need my help, I have work, next summer I'll have a new baby to take care of, next semester my clinicals will start and once my husband gets back I'll only have one year of nursing school left, woohoo!!!

There's a lot of work to do, but I'm grateful for a husband that often reminds me that "the hardest part about our life is that we've been blessed with so many opportunities". We have trials, but I'm grateful for a Heavenly Father that has sent me so much help, an endless amount of love and support, and most of all, for an eternal perspective. I'm beyond humbled to know so many good people and to know that they've all been placed in my life by a divine orchestration. Trials in this life can seem endless, but it makes
it so much sweeter knowing that the blessings are eternal. ❤️❤️❤️





Pictured above: Army of Helaman coins gifted to us from my husbands aunt before his deployment.



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