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What I Learned This Semester (Spring '16)

I'm human, just like every person on this planet, therefore I make mistakes. I'm right some of the time, but I'm still learning just like everyone else. But, there are some things I thought I knew that I'm finding out I'm very wrong about how I thought it all worked, but I'm happy to be finding out the right way.

School is always a challenge in one way or another, no matter who are, but if you're like me you'll probably be stressing out over a million things, cry, have meltdowns over exams, and just want to quit. I'm sure that scenario sounds very familiar to a lot of people, I'm not alone.

Although school can be hard, I can honestly say I love it. I love going to school and learning new things. I just love learning, period. This semester was different though, even though I just had a math class and zumba, it was very different. I guess it was the way I approached it, but the things I learned were not only about math and zumba, but I learned how God works, or at least a tiny bit of how He works through the Holy Ghost and why faith is so important.

I always thought that if I had faith, Heavenly Father would just make things work, and I'd think "Wow, that was amazing, He made it work even though I didn't do anything and just had faith!" I honestly don't know where that idea came from, I wasn't taught that, but I guess I just never truly understand how it would all work out.

What actually happened this semester was this: I had to take a math class in order to take the remainder of the science classes I need to graduate, but 2 years ago I tested into 3 math classes under what I actually needed. I felt dumb and like I shouldn't move on cause the 3 extra semesters just felt too overwhelming. I shared these feelings with my husband of course, but instead of giving me the easy way out and letting me give up, his response was "Just study and take the placement test again, you have nothing to lose, you can do it if you put in the effort and I'll help you."

I wasn't sure how I'd do it, I kept thinking "How am I going to study and test into 3 math classes higher to get into the math I need?" and all of that just sounded impossible to me. Then of course, I just did the usual and prayed. I asked for guidance from Heavenly Father to help me figure out where to go next. That's when my brother suggested that I use a website he used to help him with his math class (khanacademy.org). I got on the website and I remembered what I had a hard time with was arithmetic, so I worked on the arithmetic problems on the website and Daniel took care of Luna every night for a few days while I sat on the computer and studied and prayed my little butt off.

I think I decided to retake the test on a Tuesday, and I started studying that week. The next Monday was the first day of school, and that same morning I went to campus to take the placement test. I was very nervous before and during the test, and I really had no clue how I did. After my test I walked out into the lobby and the lady at the front said "Okay, here you go" and handed me a paper with the math class I needed to get into. I couldn't think of anything but "WHAT!? HOW?!" and after a short celebration about how big of a miracle this was for me, I rushed to the bathroom so I could cry and say a thank you prayer.

That was just the beginning. I still had to sign up for a class that would start that same night, get my book, solution manual, and celebrate! So the one of the things I learned was that I needed to pray more than I thought I did. Another thing I needed to do was LISTEN. I can't stress it enough that if you're praying, you also need to be listening, and looking for the answer to your questions.

The semester went on and I was stressing out the whole time, but I continued to pray, read my scriptures, asked my husband for blessings, etc. I did all of that plus study as much as I could. At times I had family and friends watch my baby girl when my husband was at drill or working, and sometimes she helped me by scribbling on my homework! lol Either way, I made it work with tons of help.

I must admit that many, many times I did NOT think I'd be writing this post, even though I REALLY wanted to. I thought that it would go something like "Heavenly Father is great and helped me pass my class" but that's not exactly how I feel. The way this semester actually worked was me doing my part, a whole lot of work, studying my butt off, and the Lord reassured me that I could do it. Every time I wanted to quit, He reminded me that I needed to trust His plan for me, and that He needs me to put in the effort in order for me to get to where He needs me.

So He knew that I could do it..the whole time He knew. Why did I ever doubt that I could? It almost makes me want to smack myself. If my Heavenly Father and the Savior know that I can do this, then why do I doubt? I shouldn't be asking for a easy way out. I shouldn't try to quit.  I should be asking "how". How can I make it through this? How can I see progress? Where do I go from here?

Now that the semester is over I can finally look back and understand how God and my Savior Jesus Christ helped me. They did not give me extra points on my final. They did not appear to me and tell me which answers to choose on my test. They reassured me that I could do it, that I needed to trust them and do my part, and everything would fall into place. Thankfully I did pass my math class, even with an A- and I've never had an A in math before. Maybe a C once..but never an A.

Now I can finally move on to my last few classes and get my degree, and I know that with much faith and guidance I will get there. And I will probably shed many tears when that day comes! LOL

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